Sunday, September 11, 2016

Cuba Dave...

Lots of things happened while "Busting Chops" was on hiatus, so it will take some time to catch up with the most egregious and ridiculous stories that have come across our desk. This one is an inter-office favorite, so let's get to it. Dave Strecker, better known as "Cuba Dave", was snagged by the authorities while attempting to leave Costa Rica and has been remanded to jail while awaiting trial. For those who don't know or are not familiar with the adult recreational activity known as whoremongering, Cuba Dave was once the lifestyle's internet Pied Piper, replete with a website chronicling his exploits and a Facebook page. He is also a published author, Hey, Adolf Hitler wrote a book, why not this dickhead? 

Dave started out as a mild mannered and unassuming softball player and construction worker,  who until his incarceration resided in Key West. Florida. He was honored in his former home state of Minnesota for his accomplishments on the field, and is rumored to have been inducted into softball's version of the Hall of Fame. I have no idea whether this was a local or national award. Regardless, here he is at some type of function held in his honor-


Halls of fame in any sport are usually a rogue's gallery of villains who have participated in all manner of nefarious skulduggery off the field, and Cuba Dave is no different. Whether he will have this honor stripped in absentia is yet to be determined, but his legal problems certainly are a black eye for the sport. Back to the predicament at hand. A while after his divorce, Dave began trolloping for whores in Cuba (so much for Americans not being able to travel freely in that country) and accumulated over 40 trips until he wore out his welcome. It's not inconceivable that someone from the Castro government had a word with him on his last outbound flight and was probably told nunca to come back. 

He then took his talents to the North Coast of the Dominican Republic and began updating his various social media accounts, showering his adoring public with live, on-the-spot video reports that rankled the motherfuckers in charge of shit in the little whore town of Sosua. He even had the fucking audacity of having some sort of meet-and-greet, replete with a banner announcing his presence (refreshments served!!!), like some asshole doing a book tour. His easy-going demeanor earned him a hero's backlash that reverberated all throughout the whoremongering world. Adult entertainment establishments like PMP and Passion's, an institution in Sosua for over ten years, were shut down, never again to open. The owner of Passion's, German expat Peter Jensen, was charged with trafficking women for purposes of sexual exploitation and was, along with his wife, thrown in jail for three months pending charges of human trafficking and other illicit crap*.

*(It is worth noting that countries like the Dominican Republic follow the Napoleonic Code, Anyone arrested for anything is considered guilty until proven innocent, which is why three months detention in a third world shithole is par for the course for anyone unfortunate enough to get busted, and why anyone who lives there will tell you if you get into an automobile accident, even if it's not your fault, your best bet is to leave the scene, especially if you're a tourist or an expat. The other reason is that if you are arrested and there is any damage, YOU will be responsible for whatever got fucked up, and if you hurt someone you will owe the family money that MUST be paid or you will NOT be able to leave the country.)

Here is Cuba Dave frolicking with the chicas of Sosua, Dominican Republic-

Cuba Dave, keeping it on the down-low (NOT!!!)-

On his last trip to Sosua, Cuba Dave posted a cryptic video message that was difficult to analyze from the lack of details provided. From what we've gathered, he ran into a circumstance where he was extorted by one of his birdies who was in cahoots with the local police. He then left town (after paying quite a bit of cash to NOT go to jail) and never returned. He was duly blamed for causing the mayhem he left behind, and many business owners are still pissed at him for the job he did of blowing up their spots and putting Sosua on blastola. The town is currently undergoing changes which many business owners are not happy with, and the beginnings can be traced to Cuba Dave's internet antics. There are other political and financial forces at play as well, but Dave certainly did not help.

He was actually detained by the authorities when he flew back to Florida, and had all of his electronic equipment confiscated, which was later returned. This should have given him a hint that he was under surveillance, but again he did not heed to warning and continued on to Costa Rica to resume his pathetic shtick. Here is a photo of Cuba Dave's crap that was bagged and tagged by the US customs officers-

He used to give his hapless legion of loser fanboys "tips" from the comfort of his abode, a room in his apartment where the walls were covered with photos of his "conquests". Were these young women happy about this? Did he even get their permission? Thanks to Cuba Dave, it was now possible to visually sample the wares so cats making a trip would know who to look for, so in his mind he was doing these women a complete solid. The important thing about this lifestyle is discretion, which is what homeboy violated. Many young women do not want this type of information out there for all to see. They may not want their families knowing what they are doing. They usually tell their parents they are doing promotions for a club in a tourist area, or are working as a waitress in a bar or restaurant. Far too many have foreign boyfriends who send them money via Western Union. These men are derisively referred to around the home office as LDP's-Long Distance Pendejos. The women tell these guys they are home reading the bible when they are actually out on the strip looking for dates. They usually take umbrage at some moron trying to "big them up" on the internet if any of these scenarios are the case.

In the lair of the beast, with photos of all the girls he's "loved" before-

So after he gets sent packing from the Dominican Republic, where to next for our hero? Why Costa Rica, of course. He began where he left off, with videos talking up the hotels that will let you take a prostitute into your room for free, and restaurants and bars catering to the scene, According to him, he was doing Costa Rica tourism a favor and claimed he was NOT promoting prostitution, which is illegal in Costa Rica due to a new law that was passed shortly before he started his shenanigans. On September 4, 2015, he was picked up at the airport while attempting to fly back home and was taken away in handcuffs by a squad of police officers that had been monitoring his online persona. He will be the first foreigner charged with violating this new law, and the whole case will be a template for similar cases going forward. Because Cuba Dave is an American citizen, he was held because he was a flight risk. For the sake of clarification, prostitution is LEGAL in Costa Rica. Promoting the country as a sex tourism destination is NOT, and this is what this law intends to address.

Cuba Dave being unceremoniously escorted to the Hoosegow in Costa Rica-

While incarcerated, you'd figure this idiot would chill the fuck out. But nooooooooooo. Instead of exhibiting remorse and regret for offending the sovereign nation of Costa Rica in exchange for leniency, he had one of his friends put up a site called"freecubadave.com" in which he refers to himself as a "political prisoner". The writer rants about the rampant corruption of the Costa Rican judicial system, which I'm sure did not endear Dave to his captors, who I'm sure are still monitoring anything related to Cuba Dave on the internet. Note to anyone out there-next time you find myself in trouble in a foreign country and you do not have the requisite funds to pay your way out of prison, DO NOT take to the airwaves to insult the government of the country who is holding you as an involuntary guest. "Tragate la maldita lengua", show some contrition, and live to monger another day.

Inmate at San Sebastian-

The five-star accommodations available at San Sebastian do not include wi-fi or coin-operated washing machines


Along with being a platform for his fucking too-stupid-to-be-believed diatribes against the Costa Rican judicial system, Cuba Dave is also using the site to solicit funds for his defense. He was initially held in San Sebastian prison, which incredibly, has been slated for closing due to poor conditions and overcrowding. Again, for a proper perspective, this prison must have been Dante's Inferno if it's considered so bad it's being shuttered, given the quality of typical Latin American slammers. After a few months he was placed in a facility for aging criminals, where life is not as harsh. Though no date has been announced, his trial is coming up very soon.

We have a  few questions as to this whole mess, which no doubt will go unanswered, but hey, what are you gonna do...

1) Someone who has taken so many whoremongering trips MUST have some sort of disposable income, His story that he's nothing but a humble day laborer in the construction business simply does not make sense, not at his age and not with the amount of trips he's taken. At one point, he was taking a mongering trip once a fucking month. Working class dudes can't front that combination of free time and cash from paycheck to check. We here at "Busting Chops" have known our share of men who have dedicated their time and money to this so-called "hobby", and to a man they all have loot they do not admit having. Some mongers are your run-of-the-mill front artists and liars. That's the type of cat this particular game attracts. This hobby is all about having time and money to travel and spend on whores. You need plenty of both. No way Cuba Dave was living paycheck to paycheck. So why solicit money from the general public and claim you're broke with so much at stake?

A) Because he's mentally ill, miserly, and wants people to feel sorry for him.

B) He wants someone else to foot the bill for his problem so the money he DOES have stashed away he can spend on more mongering trips when he gets out.

C) He's an asshole with an egregious sense of entitlement who is also in denial*.

(*If you chose all three, you are correct.)

Cuba Dave in Key West, Florida-

Cuba Dave on a construction site, working hard to save money for his next trip-

Cuba Dave cuts a semi-athletic figure. Not bad for a geriatric schmuck in his golden years. He looks more robusto than you're average 65-year old man, despite the crocodilian skin tone. That's because for the last few years he's been taking a steady cocktail of steroids. This is what's given him the stamina to travel so much and bang so many prostitutes. From what I know about these drugs, his regimen would have had to include testosterone and HgH. I can only assume his supply was impossible to get while in jail, At his age, this would affect his endocrine system tremendously, leading to depression and a wholesale change in his physical appearance for the worse. Given the fact that a man his age has had to endure such harsh conditions while in jail, it could very well be that his mongering days are over. Sixty-five is not the age where someone can just pick up life where they left off if they were mongering hardcore like Cuba Dave and went through such a harrowing experience. Regardless of the outcome, he will no doubt be left scarred for the rest of his life.

Will he be able to continue working construction jobs, given that it's a young man's game? Highly doubtful. He'll have to settle for telling old war stories of his misadventures in some seedy Key West bar full of other septuagenarian has-beens and losers whose meaningless existence has added up to little or nothing of consequence. Some may dismay at what this delusional ass clown has decided to devote the very few remaining years of quality life left to him. Others see him as Captain America, a man falsely imprisoned who is fighting for his freedom from a corrupt third world banana republic that is hypocritically using him as a poster boy for a practice that is perfectly legal in their own country. I was told by someone who spoke with him in person that when in the Dominican Republic he was warned about keeping his stupid shit on the lowest of down-lows, but he didn't listen. He let his internet persona overtake the person, and the attention (such as it was) must have intoxicated him. Judging from his lack of tact in dealing with his situation post-arrest, he strikes me as an man caught up in his own persona, one he manufactured not to give other mongers pertinent information, but for shallow self-aggrandizement. I'm curious to see what happens at this kangaroo trial, where he will be the lead kangaroo. And the saddest part of all this is he did it to himself, with absolutely no encouragement or provocation from others.

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