Wednesday, March 2, 2011
The Charlie Sheen Chronicles...
Charlie Sheen is the poster boy for every entitled, rich brat motherfucker whose parents let him do whatever he wanted, a guy who came into this Earth with no moral pre-set spending limit; his libido, ego and id simultaneously allowed to run amok over every conventional limitation that exist to harness one's wildest impulses. He was born too good looking, too wealthy, talented enough to get steady work and with way too much access to gratuitous sex and recreational drugs. Except the sex and drugs went far beyond a recreation-they became a vocation. He worked only to get high and have enough money to overspend on porn stars that would have fucked him for free (herein lies the biggest irony of all). This is a guy who was kicked out of high school and was caught stealing his father's credit card to pay for hookers when he was 15 years of age (who says the youth of America have no direction?). Sheen knew what he wanted from an early age, and he sallied forth in the pursuit of all the drugs, alcohol, late-night parties and prostitutes it would take to satiate his intolerably immense appetite for the seedy side of life.
During his latest interview with ABC news program "20/20", his twin sons were forcibly removed from his house by the police. Living with two whores would do that. One is a "model" who recently posed on the cover of a pro-marijuana magazine and the other a straight-up porn star (aptly nicknamed "The Goddesses"). The other thing could have been the drug-fueled escapades and episodes of violence that have made front line news all over the world.
Charlie Sheen has effectively shut down a top-rated situation comedy that is collectively losing a grand total of $250 million dollars. CBS has promised to pay the staff (but not the actors) for four of the eight missed episodes, but that's not good enough for Sheen. He also wants to get paid and plans to sue for as much as possible. He has also insulted the show's producer with a Jewish racial slur on a radio program. On top of all that he wants a 50% raise to 3 million dollars an episode.
It is clear this man has passed the point of no return. He's lived this type of life way too long to ever make the transition back to reality. The reality we mere mortals have to deal with-the boredom, the disappointments and frustrations of everyday life-is something he knows nothing about, and cynically mocks to no end. He's just going to get crazier and crazier, and the only thing that will cause a crash will be an overdose or the loss of his fortune. Being born a rich kid with matinee-idol looks with acting chops is usually a recipe for an amazing life. But Sheen decided to drag himself through the mud, giving in to his most crass, low-brow desires, all the while convincing himself while on this Vaseline-lubricated ride down Hades Highway that most men if given the opportunity would behave the same way, and any criticism from the public is just a frustrated expression of jealousy from people who would kill to live like him. We have witnessed his metamorphosis from Hollywood's eternal good-time party boy to a disturbingly bizarro-twin brother mutant of Travis Bickle, minus the taxi cab-
But if not, I'll make sure to stay tuned. Let's face it-who doesn't like watching a good car wreck?