Monday, March 29, 2010

Film Recommendation of the Week...

Release date October 15, 1973.
Running time 1 hour 35 minutes.

As a reminder, you can click on this or any other photo in the blog and it will enlarge it for you. This movie, starring Sissy Spacek and Martin Sheen, is one of those underrated American films that only movie critics and other nerds talk about. Which is why it is being featured here on "Busting Chops".

The story is loosely based on the 1958 real-life crime spree of 20-year old Charles Starkweather and his then 14-year old girlfriend, Caril Ann Fugate, which left eleven people dead all over Nebraska and Wyoming. Starkweather received the death penalty and Fugate, who never actually murdered any of the victims but was along for the ride and did aid and abet her boyfriend while the were on the run from the law, received a 17 year sentence for her role. The film is narrated from the POV (movie parlance for Point Of View) of the young girl.

The dreamlike, fair-tale manner in which the film was done worked in it's favor. The director, Terrence Malick, used this tactic to juxtapose the immature, youthful, romantic relationship of the two fugitives with the horrific violence perpetrated by the boyfriend.

Never have two losers looked so mahvelous, dahling. Spacek and Sheen were both young and good looking, and the film is beautifully shot in some pretty breathtaking locations. But it's the superb acting that makes it worth watching. You get the feeling you're watching two maestros at work. Both Sheen and Spacek really disappear into their respective roles and make the audience believe they are watching two young people in love and running off looking for excitement like any other foolishly young couple in love. Except in this case Sheen just so happens to be a sociopathic killer.

Saturday, March 27, 2010

Babe of the Week for March 26, 2010 is...

Elizabeth Berkley!!!

Sorry about slacking off for a while on this particular segment of my blog, but it's back. And nothing shakes the cobwebs off like a tall, beautiful golden goddess-a Nordic amazon straight out of Ted Nugent's home state of Michigan. Thankfully Elizabeth is much better looking than the Motor City Madman, who is not only homely but is a right-wing kook. We here at "Busting Chops" don't really care for politics, especially when it gets in the way of drooling over this incredible-looking woman.
She started off as Zack's on-again, off-again girlfriend on the stupendously moronic sit-com "Saved by the Bell". The only reason it remained on the air as long as it did was because the cast members were all gorgeous, except for Dustin Diamond, the asshole who played Screech.

But who cares about him-let's focus on our girl-

She was also in one of the worst movies of all time, "Showgirls". The only bright spot was that she was naked throughout most of this disaster of a pathetic flick. This is the only reason worth watching it. Here she is on "Late Night with David Letterman" doing promotion for it. The highlight of this very funny clip is Dave getting a lap dance from Elizabeth-

Regardless of this unfortunate choice in movie roles, she still loooks mahvelous, dahling-absolutely mahvelous!!! So who cares?

Monday, March 22, 2010

The Issue of Gambling...

There is nothing, and I mean NOTHING that can drain a celebrity's net worth faster than a gambling problem. It is so bad that in terms of vices, you are better off with a drug/alcohol problem. David Gahan, the lead singer of Depeche Mode encapsulated this issue better than anyone I've ever heard.

During the mid 90's when he moved to California and became a Goth freak with the tattoos, long hair and needle marks from heroin abuse, he stated his biggest problem was not the drug addiction itself, terrible as it was with the overdoses and the flat lining in the ambulance.

The people he was partying with had a floor they hit once they ran out of money to feed their addiction. So after a while they had no choice but to seek treatment. Gahan's problem was he had access to an unlimited amount of money so he could afford to stay high as long as he wanted.

This certainly is NOT the case for athletes gambling. With gambling, how easy is it, if you are a high roller, to lose hundreds of thousands of dollars IN ONE NIGHT? This was Antoine Walker's dilemma. He would walk into a casino and be handed a line of credit that would be extended if he fell too far down on his bets. Next thing you know his debts are in the millions of dollars, and for what?

Apparently Allen Iverson has been chased by the same demons. A reporter was quoted as saying that during Allen's time in Denver he was at the casino gambling EVERY SINGLE NIGHT. Now that his career is pretty much over and that fat contract has been paid out, what is he going to gamble with now that his wife has filed for divorce and is reportedly demanding alimony and child support for their five children?

Allen Iverson, on his ass in more ways than one-

Collectively Iverson and Walker have earned in contracts and endorsements over 300 million dollars during their careers. Walker is in serious debt and Iverson supposedly has his own money problems. Like I stated in a previous post, I will not hammer these guys for this. There are plenty of enablers, leeches and hoochies who play their roles behind the scenes. They are hardly ever exposed for what they are, especially in light of the fact that they are the first to run away from these guys when the gravy train gets derailed.

With such a high percentage of pro athletes mismanaging their money and ending up completely broke shortly after they retire, I believe it's high time something is done to stem this pathetic tide. Sure, these athletes are grown men and should know better, but their lifestyle does not speak to good business sense and fiscal responsibility. It is sad how some of these guys end up on Skid Row after giving their fans so many moments of sheer joy. Something should definitely be done about this, but exactly what I do not know.

How Winners Lose...

I'm not going to bother with a self-righteous rant about personal and fiscal responsibility, and how pro athletes who live the lifestyle of the rich and famous should know better than to blow through their fortunes shortly after they leave their respective sport. I will post this video so that everyone can just see it. I don't pity Antoine Walker but I won't get on his ass either because it's not completely his fault. He had plenty of help getting to where he is right now, which is playing in the Puerto Rican League for peanuts on a non-guaranteed contract.

The point is his family, friends and business associates must share the blame. Young black men who have the opportunity to make money as professional athletes are targets everywhere they turn. From prostitutes/groupies posing as girlfriends to con artists posing as businessmen to their own network of parasitic friends and family. The pressure to give in and let everyone eat off what they make is enormous. No one can judge unless they've been there.

I find it hilarious how people get on their soapboxes and start talking about what they would do if they had such-and-such amount of money and how they would tell everyone of their friends and relatives "NO". Yeah right. Funny how fast typical losers who make shit money, live paycheck to paycheck and have nothing to show for the little money they DO make suddenly morph into E.F. Hutton when the thought of handling big money pops into their heads.

I know the ghetto mentality and how dysfunctional, poor people think. They live in a universe devoid of practicality, manners, common sense and impulse control. There are three ways these type of poor people believe they'll come into some life-altering money, and not one involves getting an education and establishing a white collar career for themselves or their children. Here is the list-

1) Hustling-involvement in some type of illegal activity that will net a windfall of loot in a short span of time, because their attitude is if they can't have it right away they don't want it. The short-sightedness boggles the mind when you think that living big for some of these cats involves having a $75,000 car parked in front of the projects and enough money to buy everyone orders of General Tso's chicken to be washed down with a cold, refreshing malt liquor of their choice...

...and don't forget the obligatory Blunts!!!

2) The lottery. Go into any poor, urban neighborhood on lottery day. These people have their sets of numbers and lottery tickets organized in little books, and they spend big money in a futile attempt to hit that imaginary jackpot so they can build a mansion and retire in the same piece-of-shit, crackpot third world country from whence they slithered out of. Suddenly the shit hole country they were so desperate to leave, the one they vowed never to return to, turns into paradise when the thought of lying on the beach with a cold beer in one hand and an underage prostitute in the other without a care in the world becomes a possibility, regardless of how remote.

3) Lawsuit settlement against the city/state. Example-some idiot who works parking cars in a municipal lot has a child who was in an accident where the opportunity to sue the city presented itself, and next thing you know when the kid turns 18 he becomes Mr. Moneybags. All of his relatives line up and treat him nice just so they can hopefully get a check to open up that bakery, hair salon or just to buy brand a new car so they can finally floss like big-time ballers in their impoverished neighborhoods.

Back to Antoine Walker. Suffice it to say that surrounding oneself with broke, jive-ass leeches from the old neighborhood and comping their lifestyles to match that of yours is something that is fiercely ingrained into many athletes who come from such backgrounds. The ghetto pounds it into their heads that they somehow owe the people and community they grew up in something when they turn pro at their chosen sport. It's part of the "Keepin' It Real" mantra that is espoused by people who have no idea what it really means. Being down-to-Earth and humble is one thing. Having to constantly prove this with misguided loyalty to a bunch of lowlife ghetto sea urchins is another. And to think a few short years ago, this was him celebrating a World Championship with the Miami Heat-

Some of these characters, the ones so many athletes surround themselves with as part of their "posses", are lazy, shiftless bums who don't want anything unless someone is giving it to them. And as in Antoine Walker's case, they soon disappear once the money dries up. This man generated tons of cash in his career, enough to make a difference in the lives of his children and their children.

It's called "Generational Wealth", wealth that if invested wisely is enough to break the cycle of poverty so many of these athletes come from. I know how hard it is for a fact. How in a dingy, typical inner-city apartment you can have three generations of the same family all living not with each other, but on top of one another. The dysfunction breeds like a fungus, infecting and polluting even the most well-intentioned person who wants to work hard towards a better future. This stranglehold is so powerful, toxic and detrimental it's a marvel that anyone makes it out in one piece. I'll give it to anyone who comes from such a negative and deprived atmosphere and manages to make something of themselves. Under such circumstances even getting a job at the Post Office could be seen as a victory few cam claim, and definitely nothing to scoff at. Fuckin' A you gotta start somewhere.

Antoine Walker is not the first nor will he be the last pro athlete to lose his money with the help of unscrupulous business associates, parasitic friends and opportunistic family members who shame these guys into giving them things just because they are blood relatives. It is a symptom of a sick and twisted mindset that exists everywhere, but nowhere does it hurt more than when the athlete is from a deprived background.

As for their "posses", these same moochers are the ones who not only help pro athletes spend and lose their money on stupid shit like cars with hooked-up stereos and spinning rims, but many times ruin their careers by advocating a lifestyle detrimental to their athletic success. No way Antoine Walker is out of the league at the age of 33 if he had people around him helping him stay in shape and working on his game. These enablers are too busy blowing smoke up these athlete's behinds, telling them that once they sign that long-term contract their work is done, when the reality is it's only just begun.

Yes, Antoine-I'd look sad too if I were you right about now.

Antoine Walker is said to have had somewhere in the realm of 50-70 friends, family members and assorted hoochies on his payroll at any given time during the course of his career. Apart from the egregious and obscene amounts spent on gambling, cars, trips, parties and houses this is what really broke his back financially.

So for all you pro athletes out there who don't have a clue, a posse should look like this...

...NOT like this.

Friday, March 19, 2010

How to Groom Pt. 3...

Some guys stink, and some guys look like they stink even if they bathe and wash their hair on a daily basis. Don't be either guy. How does one go about combating this? Well, I'm here to help. Cologne is a very personal issue, and what one person likes another may hate. My advice to anyone trying to navigate the world of men's fragrances is to go to any high quality department store or dedicated perfume/cologne shop and make those beautiful and intimidating fragrance girls work for their money. You know, the ones want to crop dust you with the latest Calvin Klein cologne as you're walking past them on your way to the Nike and Adidas sportswear section.

Not every department store is considered equal. A Macy's in a strip mall in Jersey is not like the Macy's on 34th Street and Herald Square in Manhattan. The Manhattan location is world-renown and has many employees dedicated to cosmetics and perfumes/colognes right on the first floor. Go there or choose a comparable site and meticulously take your time. Under no circumstances should you go with a woman. This advice may seem counter-intuitive but the whole point to personal grooming is that you're doing it for yourself and not impress others. What one woman likes another may hate. You have to train yourself to choose a cologne for whichever occasion you need it.

For the time being I use Aqua Quorum. It is the sport edition of their regular men's cologne and is much lighter and breezier. I have gotten many compliments on this particular fragrance and have not yet ran into anyone that did not like it. I typically use this for all occasions, but I now realize that for more formal occasions something a bit more serious will be necessary. So go to a department store that has a wide selection and try out various colognes, and make sure you let the sales clerk know you are not interested in buying whatever latest fragrance-du-jour. It may take a while, but once you find the one you want you'll be set for the next few years at the very least(or until it's discontinued).

Keep in mind that there is no bigger rip-off in retail than men's cologne. They are so overpriced that it is not uncommon for you to find the exact same cologne for up to $25 cheaper online. Just do your homework, put in the requisite time and don't act as if you're in a hurry and you'll eventually find something you'll like spraying on every morning at a very reasonable price.

How to Groom Pt. 2...

Gentlemen-put away that clunky, graceless oversize Diesel watch. If you wear one of these to go out, you need to stay indoors until you can come up with a better idea for what looks good on your wrist. And that G-Shock? If you need a watch this rugged, you are probably reading my blog from the mountains of Afghanistan, in which case I salute you for defending our country.

But if you're ready for something with style, elegance and grace, something that has an understated sense of confidence and sophistication, if you're ready for a time piece as opposed to just a watch, then you are ready to step up to Movado.

Yes, there are more expensive watches, with names only very wealthy assholes and collectors have ever heard of. And you can pay a lot more money for a much uglier watch. But the sleek, classic lines of many of Movados' lines speak to their timelessness. You will never be out of style or out of the conversation with one of these on your wrist.

Whether you prefer the elegance of their leather band "Museum" edition or one of their various all-stainless steel sport editions, you will find a Movado for every occasion. There are morons who believe telling people at social gatherings that their $15,000 piece-of-garbage that no one has ever heard of was meticulously manufactured by Swiss midgets who yodel in the Alps on their days off and cross-country ski to work every day, but a Movado lets people know that you know elegance when you see it. And so will they, because when you wear one you become elegance personified. And that is something no one needs to be told. One can tell simply by asking the time.

Thursday, March 18, 2010

How to Groom Pt. 1...

Let's face it, guys-we have no idea what women want. And since they keep changing the goalposts whenever we think we're getting close, it's useless to even try. The trick is to know what you want for yourself and not give a damn who likes it or who doesn't. You'd be surprised how many women find this attitude refreshing and attractive. Unfortunately this revelation comes at a cost-but you can minimize the amount you pay in emotional distress and utter confusion by taking a page right out of MTV's smash hit reality show "Jersey Shore".

The key is to channel your inner "Guido", and there is no one better to help us navigate the pitfalls of this demanding yet utterly necessary and vital journey than Rhode Island's very own Paul "DJ Pauly D" Delvecchio. This cat made a name for himself as the smooth-talking ladies man who never lost his cool under any circumstances and more importantly, never had a hair out of place, whether it was at the gym, the tanning salon or the club with the other cast members of the show fist-pumping to some truly unfortunate House music.

Here is Pauly D "hooking up" with yet another flirtatious and attractive hoochie mama-

We'll start with the hair-why? I'm sick and tired of the forced labor camp look I see most guys sporting. It's official-the ceasar haircut is played out. Nothing says "I give up" more than a badly shanked, chopped-up version of a terrible haircut masquerading as a lower-case baldy that you did yourself in your bathroom with a $20 Norelco beard trimmer. If you want to go bald, be a man and do it all the way with the proper tools-a Schick Select razor, some shaving cream and a bottle of rubbing alcohol to slap on your dome when you're done. If you can withstand that type of pain, you can rock a baldy with style. Most of you out there cannot, so why not try something different?

Here are the products you will need to pull this look off-

1) Joico ICE Spiker Glue.

2) Got2b Glued Plastering Freeze Spray.

3) Hair dryer.

4) Styling comb.

Don't waste your time experimenting with anything else. This combo works.

And if the problem is you're too cheap to get a proper trim at a barbershop, complete with a neatly-done hairline and a sideburns shape-up, then you might as well walk around with striped pajamas and install barbed wire around your windows, because that's what you look like walking out of your house with that stupid ceasar haircut-a fucking POW hitting the prison yard for morning roll call.

Here is a video to show you how it's done, son-

Next up-the tan. Many dermatologists say tanning machines cause cancer. You know what? Everything causes cancer. So how would you prefer getting it? Sitting in some bar every night drinking your life away pining for glory days past that only existed in your own head, or do you want to step up to the plate and start living? I would rather die looking good and having fun than waiting for my diseased liver to explode like a hand grenade.

Without a tan, the average guys' complexion varies between that of a dress mannequin and the cold slab of meat you'd find in any morgue refrigerator that was previously seen walking out of a bar rocking a caesar haircut before drunkenly stumbling into an oncoming bus.

You don't have to go overboard, just enough to give your skin a healthy glow. You'd be surprised what a difference it makes especially if you, like me, live in the northern part of the US where the winters are long and depressing. And this is coming from one of the whitest guys you'll ever run across.

I once had a dermatologist tell me that I should do myself a favor and get some sun every once in a while. She said this after I took my shirt off, and you could imagine the embarrassment I felt, as she was Irish and about as white as a 1920's film actress. Immediately I thought to myself, "If she's telling me I'm too pale, then something has GOT to be wrong!!!"

You can try if you live in the New York City area. They have the best tanning beds and the best prices with locations all over the tri-state area. This is the only way to keep your tan up during those brutal Northeastern winter months. Why walk around looking all pasty-faced and anemic when with a little effort you can stand out from the crowd?

I've been told that taking an interest in your looks is gay, or metrosexual (which basically translates into the same thing). Well, Pauly D and his incredibly obnoxious roommate Mike "The Situation" Sorrentino got more ass than a toilet during the filming of "Jersey Shore" and continued to do so once they began doing paid personal appearances at clubs and awards ceremonies. You tell me who's gay-these guys who are out there scoring more than Lebron James or the random, anonymous asshole sitting at home in his basement watching them on TV calling them names, with the remote control in one hand and a big bag of Fritos Lays' corn chips in the other?

So remember guys, it's not important to imitate someone elses' style-it may not work for you. The key is to incorporate whatever you can from different sources and through trial and error develop a style all your own. And don't forget to beat that beat up next time you're out on the dance floor-you'll thank me later.

Beat Up That Beat Ish (DJ Phlipz Remix - DJ Benny C Video) from DJ PHLIPZ on Vimeo.