Sunday, January 31, 2010

Babe of the Week For January 29th, 2010 is...

Penelope Cruz!!!

Not only is Penelope Cruz beautiful, but she's talented as well!!! That's a superfluous bonus for us here on Busting Chops, but I figure I'd mention it just in case. She has acted in American, Spanish and Italian movies and is a favorite of Spanish director Pedro Almodovar. Before I go on, a few more photos...

Did I forget to mention Penelope has a sister just as hot as she is? Diablo...

She has been outstanding throughout her career playing the role of the mentally disheveled feminine co-lead opposite some very strong leading male actors-her standout performance as the talented but unstable artist Maria Elena in Woody Allen's "Vicky Cristina Barcelona" is a favorite. Others include the Italian film "Don't Move" and "Blow" with Johnny Depp. Imagine if those two had kids. Man, would they loook mahvelous, dahling-absolutely mahvelous!!!

Here she is with The Woodman himself-

Film Recommendation of the Week...

This week I present the war trilogy of Roberto Rossellini. He is considered the pioneer of the neo-realist style of film making that developed out of the ashes and ruins of post-WWII Europe. Rossellini is a director of great impact and importance in the history of film, and I will let the description from Criterion speak on the behalf of these films-

"Roberto Rossellini is one of the most influential filmmakers of all time. And it was with his trilogy of films made during and after World War II—Rome Open City, Paisan, and Germany Year Zero—that he left his first transformative mark on cinema. With their stripped-down aesthetic, largely nonprofessional casts, and unorthodox approaches to storytelling, these intensely emotional works were international sensations and came to define the neorealist movement. Shot in battle-ravaged Italy and Germany, these three films are some of our most lasting, humane documents of devastated postwar Europe, containing universal images of both tragedy and hope."

Rome, Open City
Release date September 27, 1945.
Running time 1 hour 40 minutes.
Italian and German w/English subtitles.

This film is a fictional yet realistic account of the Nazi occupation of Rome, and those brave souls who dared to fight against Fascism. It was filmed while the Nazis were still in Italy, but had abandoned the then-recently liberated city of Rome.

Release date December 10th, 1946.
Running time 2 hours.
Italian/German/Sicilian/English w/English subtitles.

This film is broken down into 6 different parts, with stories that cover the whole of Italy and the struggles faced by people trying to recover their lives after liberation from the iron grip of Nazism.

Germany Year Zero
Release date December 1, 1948.
Running time 1 hour 11 minutes.
German w/English subtitles.

This film captures the ravaged city Berlin in the aftermath of it's capitulation to the Allied forces and the struggle to survive in this war-torn hellhole as seen through the eyes of a 12 year-old German boy.

So what made Rossellini's films so powerful? For the most part he used people who had no previous acting experience. This enabled him to mold the performances to his liking, as opposed to having the inevitable tug-of-war that quite oftentimes occurs on a film set between actor and director. He also had the fertile creative ground of post-war Europe as a backdrop for his human dramas, which more than anything emphasized the struggle for life like few catastrophes can capture.

Thursday, January 21, 2010

Finally Someone Steps Up the the Plate Pt. 2...

Jack Clark, a former slugger who played for the St. Louis Cardinals, had some choice words about Mark McGuire. Here is a bit from the article recently published by the St. Louis Post-Dispatch-

Jack Clark's time in the spotlight fell mostly in the years before the so-called steroids era.

That didn't stop the former Cardinals and Giants All-Star slugger from revealing an extreme distaste for players who might have availed themselves of a performance-enhancing drug during their time in the big leagues.

"A lot of them should be banned from baseball, including Mark McGwire," Clark told the St. Louis Post-Dispatch.

Clark served as the Dodgers' hitting coach several years ago. He said McGwire, who will return to baseball this season as the Cardinals' hitting coach, was in a group of players that clearly didn't warrant consideration for Cooperstown.

"All those guys are cheaters -- A-Rod [Alex Rodriguez]. Fake, phony. Rafael Palmeiro. Fake, a phony," Clark told the newspaper. "[Roger] Clemens, [Barry] Bonds. [Sammy] Sosa. Fakes. Phonies. They don't deserve to be in the Hall of Fame.

"They should all be in the Hall of Shame," Clark said. "They can afford to build it. They've all got so much money. And they could all go there and talk about the next way to rub something on your skin. The whole thing is creepy.

"They're all creeps. All these guys have been liars."

Clark, a four-time All-Star who hit .267 and belted 340 home runs in 18 seasons, mocked the apologetic and sorrowful tone of McGwire's Monday admission that he used steroids during much of his major league career.

"They're not really a man's man," Clark said. "They're just whimpering boys who are just sad to watch. They try to put it off on somebody else. I don't know how they sleep at night, looking at all their fame, let alone the money they took by faking everybody out and lying to everybody."

At least there is outrage over this in the MLB ranks. When you have the baseball Commissioner giving McGuire props and respect, you realize that those in the highest positions of the sport didn't care a bit about what was going on.

So the next time anyone yammers on about "level playing field" and "fair play", all you have to do is point the person in Bud Selig's direction. Just follow the stench of feces that constantly dribbles out of that orangutan's putrid mouth.

Wednesday, January 20, 2010

Finally Someone Steps Up To The Plate...

Carlton Fisk, a 24-year-old veteran who played for Boston and Chicago, a member of the Baseball Hall of Fame, a catcher from back in the days who played the toughest position in the game, put it on these steroid freaks in an interview today with the Chicago Sun-Times.

Unfortunately not enough of these cats are speaking out, probably because they don't want to ruffle any feathers amongst their peers in their exclusive fraternity. But homeboy said Fuck It, and I for one applaud him for it. I won't embellish anything he said-no embellishment is needed.

Here is the majority of the article-

Fisk blasted McGwire, Roger Clemens, Barry Bonds and other alleged or admitted steroid abusers in baseball, calling McGwire's recent claim that steroids did not help him hit more home runs "a crock."

"(McGwire) says, 'Well, it doesn't help eye-and-hand coordination.' Well, of course it does. It allows you more acuity physically and mentally and optically. You are going to be stronger and you are going to be better," said Fisk, who starred for the Red Sox and White Sox.

"Some of these numbers that are out there are really warped. Should they be considered? You saw how McGwire was viewed in the Hall of Fame voting. If you take the length of time that (steroid abusers) use that stuff and subtract 15 or 20 home runs a year for those guys, where are their numbers then?"

McGwire, the new Cardinals hitting coach, apologized last week for his steroid use as a player but claimed steroids had nothing to do with him hitting 70 homers in 1998.

"That's a crock," Fisk said. "There's a reason they call it performance-enhancing drugs. That's what it does — performance enhancement. You can be good, but it's going to make you better. You can be average, but it is going to make you good. If you are below average, it is going to make you average. Some guys who went that route got their five-year, $35 million contracts and now are off into the sunset somewhere. Because once they can't use (steroids) anymore, they can't play anymore.

"And steroids, during that time, probably did as much to escalate players' salaries as did free agency, as did arbitration, and all of that stuff. It did more than just put home runs up on the board or money in the guys' pocket."

McGwire said the steroids merely helped him stay in the lineup because of injuries he had sustained.

"Try having your knees operated on and catching for 30 years," Fisk said. "Do you think you feel good when you go out there? (McGwire) had to stand around and play first base. So excuuuuuse me."

Fisk also took a shot at accused steroid user Roger Clemens.

"The reason he got let go from the Red Sox was because he was starting to break down," Fisk said. "His last couple of years in Boston just weren't very productive, a la 'The Rocket.' Then all of a sudden he goes to Toronto and he wants to show somebody something. Then he gets two consecutive Cy Young Awards (in '97 and '98). Come on, give me a bucket.

"It's obvious to players. You notice that stuff. You know how hard it is to play the game. You know how hard it is to be productive at any age, but especially at an older age. You see guys who are as productive later on as they were early (in their careers). It offends guys that stayed clean. But (the abusers) set their great, great, great grandchildren up for the rest of their lives.

"Guys are bigger, guys are stronger, granted. Strength and conditioning and all of the knowledge that goes into being a bigger, better and stronger athlete is at everybody's disposal right now. Guys are bigger and stronger. Better? I don't know about that. But there is more stuff available to guys today.

"I think back to when baseball was scuffling to recapture the passion of the American fan after the '94 season. I think baseball and everybody involved in the decision-making at every level just turned their head and said: 'This is good for baseball, look at the prosperity of the game. It's growing and growing and growing.'

"And now it's (in bad shape) because it wasn't addressed back when the rest of us knew. How did that guy (using steroids) outgrow his uniform?"

Good for you, Mr. Fisk. With these words he stood up for every player who did it without performance enhancing drugs. Cynics will point out that amphetamines (otherwise known as "greenies") were an integral part of the game back then, and that in and of itself was cheating. True. I won't dispute that. But anyone who knows anything about steroids knows that in terms of performance enhancement, you just cannot compare the two. They are worlds apart.

This man's words carry weight, and they should. Carlton Fisk has done a lot for the game, and he so happens to be the owner of one of the most exciting home runs ever hit in post season play. So I'll leave you with a photo of that historic night, a home run made all the more special because of the man who hit it, a man who is not afraid to speak out for all of those who did NOT use steroids to get to the top-

Tuesday, January 19, 2010

The Asshole Olympics...

Unlike the regular Olympics, where countries from around the world send their best and brightest steroid-ridden amateur/professional athletes to compete against those of other nations in the spirit of fair play, THESE Olympics do not require anyone to be physically fit.

The person in question just has to be an asshole, someone who has said or done something so stupid as to force me to rip them for it. Their very name must make people cringe in disgust when uttered. And the malfeasance has to be of equally monumental proportions commiserate with their status in life. So by definition, the bigger the public figure, the bigger the asshole.

And right out the box, these candidates have eschewed desires for merely making it onto the podium. They've set the bar so high for sheer assholian quintessence and have taken such herculean strides to snag the gold in what are these, the Asshole Olympics, that only cats vying for that number 1 spot will be highlighted. We have no room for the silver or bronze. And forget honorable mention. I'll make sure that all candidates worthy of this honor walk away with the gold.

We start in the world of sports with, you guessed it-

Mark McGuire-

We are supposed to believe that Big Mac only took steroids to stay healthy enough to go out there and play. His exact words were he was a "walking M*A*S*H unit". Funny, in most medical facilities they usually don't prescribe horse steroids as a course of treatment for lingering baseball injuries. So this guy could not get fit or healthy enough to play the same sport that lard-asses Bartolo Colon and CC Sabathia play? Here is a recent quote from one of the game's true iron men, Carlton Fisk-

"Try having your knees operated on and catching for 30 years. Do you think you feel good when you go out there? [McGwire] had to stand around and play first base. So excuuuuuse me."

Baseball was incredibly strenuous for McGuire, what with having to sit on his ass in the dugout for half the game while the other half was spent standing on first base waiting for someone to throw him the ball. McGuire was the type of elite athlete who'd pull a hammy spitting sunflower seed shells all over the dugout. So since he could not accept the inevitable (that he was washed up and wasn't the great home-run hitter he thought he was) he decided to turn to the needle. Which of course did not effect his hand-eye coordination whatsoever as he vehemently stresses. Yeah, right.

I'm sick of these idiots saying this. If you can get your bat speed to the point where people watching you can't see the bat from how fast you swing it, then 'roids DO have a great deal to do with improving your hitting. And here's a newsflash for those of you who are unaware-HGH has been reportedly known to improve the eyesight of users to the point where some have been able to get rid of glasses/contact lenses for the length of time they were doing a cycle. It certainly did wonders for McGuire's eyesight, because instead of seeing a mediocre career go down the tubes he began to see the ghost of Roger Maris, followed by the mass adoration of baseball fans and the inevitable dollars that followed his success.

All of this must have been quite a burden on his conscience, especially after his own brother Jay McGuire threw him under the bus in an autobiography no publishing house wanted to touch. (Someone forgot to tell Jay that tell-all books aren't for people no one gives a shit about). So homeboy exposes himself as just another frustrated wanna-be athlete jealous of his brother's success who injected even more than Mark did because he was a competitive body builder. He demonstrated one of the classic symptoms of 'roid rage-a borderline psychotic need to rip his own brother's reputation to shreds over petty jealousy. Note to this born-again jackass-Jay, next time you want to bury the hatchet with your own flesh and blood, try not to smash it in his skull. It's very unbecoming.

This unburdening of McGuire's conscience to the public at large just so happens to come on the heels of his new job as hitting coach for the St. Louis Cardinals. He had plenty of time to come out with this jive-ass bullshit way before this, but decided now was the best time because, hey!!! Baseball is welcoming him back with open arms!!! Just ask...

Tony LaRussa-

This cocksucker always thinks he's the smartest guy in the room, which usually isn't that big a stretch if you've spent most of your adult life surrounded by meathead pro ball players like he has. This self-professed "genius" and law school graduate has a hard-on for McGuire that rivals the erection Harry Reems busted whenever Linda Lovelace got within 5 feet of him. So LaRussa's homo-erotic man-crush has enabled McGuire to land work as a hitting instructor, and Mark has stated that he can't wait to tap into his mental Rolodex to help the Cardinals' hitters get better.

We here at Busting Chops tapped into our mental Rolodex (Google) to see exactly what the fuck this oversized wanna-be Charlie Lau was talking about. In 16 years of playing baseball McGuire hit over .300 only three fucking times. THREE. Seven of those years he hit .260 or below. He never got anywhere near 200 hits for a season EVER, the minimum gold standard for hitting excellence.

Here is a breakdown of three very interesting years in this asshole's career-

Games Played---------------Batting Average---------------Home Runs

1989- 143-------------------------- .231--------------------------- 33

1990- 156-------------------------- .235--------------------------- 39

1991- 154-------------------------- .201--------------------------- 22

The aforementioned numbers need no analysis. Without the steroids, which he said he began taking after 1991, you can see for yourself what type of hitter McGuire REALLY WAS. So LaRussa, in his infinite wisdom, crowns a guy with these pathetic stats a hitting guru. Even with the 'roids, he was a one-dimensional player. Yes, he cracked 49 dingers his rookie season. But he was never a HITTER. Rod Carew, George Brett, Tony Gwinn-those cats were HITTERS. This motherfucker did one thing and one thing only-he swung for the fences and either hit it out, walked or struck out. THAT"S IT. If LaRussa thinks McGuire belongs in the Hall of Fame then so does Dave Kingman, who was Mark McGuire without the wynstrol and testosterone.

McGuire's stats quoted above say one thing. His stats after he began using steroids say another. What might that be, you ask? They say this-

LaRussa has said he never had a clue McGuire was juicing, that all he saw was the hard work Mark put into the game. Hey LaRussa-that's exactly what steroids allow you to do-work harder. How the fuck do you think he got so big so fast? LaRussa has stated how he wants McGuire back in baseball because he respects his work ethic and (get this crock of holy horseshit) "INTEGRITY". This seems absurdly comical until you realize who's saying it.

Here is LaRussa, the man who values integrity above all else, in a Florida holding pen after being arrested for DUI-

LaRussa's monumental arrogance and overinflated stature in baseball stems from the vomit inducing myth-making apparatus that ex-players, sportscasters and fans all gleefully participate in. The incessant ass-kissing from the so-called "insiders", a group of ex-jocks and announcers who would rather wipe pine tar on their testicles than spend quality time with their families, is always in full effect with these cocksuckers. They go on about the sanctity of the game and how hallowed most if not all baseball records are...

Yet not once do they ever mention that if it wasn't for segregation upheld by then-baseball commissioner Kenesaw Mountain Landis back in the days no one would be talking about any of the current flock of chemically-enhanced steroid puppies and their assaults on the hallowed home run records. Because this man would have put them all out of reach-

Some of us are not stupid enough to believe any of this bullshit. Blind hero worship does not infect all fans of this great game. Besides, nothing here on "Busting Chops" is sacred when it comes to exposing arrogant, self-important dickheads, and everything is fair game for scrutiny and ridicule.

The way his fanboys make it seem, you'd think LaRussa received his law degree from an Ivy League university. Not quite. It was from Florida State University College of Law. In the center of the campus dining room hangs a portrait of the school's esteemed founder, J. Giggles Flintstone himself-

LaRussa is the idiot if he thinks we can't see hiring McGuire as a hitting instructor as anything but a blatant attempt to reconstruct McGuire's tarnished reputation so he can get voted into the Hall of Fame. Hopefully it won't happen in their lifetimes, but at least they each have the consolation of winning gold medals at the Asshole Olympics.

Albert Pujols-

Rounding out the podium is Albert Pujols, who welcomed McGuire back to the fold with open arms. He stated in an interview with ESPN that "he was proud of him for coming out and to look forward". Look forward. What this means, as used by athletes caught cheating, is to sweep it under the rug as if their steroid use never happened.

As if it had nothing to do with raising their level of athletic accomplishments.

As if it had nothing to do with the mega dollars they made in salary and endorsements.

As if their use of performance-enhancing drugs did not leave an indelible mark on society-cheat at your chosen sport and you will be rewarded handsomely.

Get caught, show contrition, lie about what cannot be proven in a court of law and be welcomed back to the fold.

And then turn the situation on it's head and claim victimhood for being persecuted.

Gotta love this country. I suggest these three assholes go to Haiti and help dig people out of the rubble. It will do wonders for their lack of humility. They still have time to get people out alive. Today, a young boy was found after being buried for eight days. EIGHT DAYS.

This poor little boy is someone we should all look up to. He has shown more courage and resiliency in what has to be one of the biggest tragedies to befall any country since the dawn of mankind. But hey, what's more important than pitchers and catchers reporting to spring training in a couple of weeks? Fuck you, Albert. Fuck all three of you graceless, classless motherfuckers for making a mockery of what sport should be about.

Sunday, January 17, 2010

Film Recommendations of the Week...

Clean and Sober
Release date August 8, 1988.
Running time 2 hours 4 minutes.

Michael Keaton's best and most underrated performance. He plays real estate agent Darryl Poynter, a man with severe drug and work-related issues who goes into drug rehab trying to escape the consequences that come from living such a toxic lifestyle. He then realizes during the course of his thirty day treatment that he can't fast-talk and con his way out of the mess he's made.

Morgan Freeman also stars in this film in an outstanding performance as Keaton's drug counselor.

Release date July 13, 2001.
Running time 1 hour 57 minutes.

Here is some more deviant asocial behavior for your viewing pleasure. Based on a true story, this film tells the tale of a group of dysfunctional, out-of-control teenagers who plan and execute the murder of an abusive peer whose behavior has everyone sick and tired. The acting is very good and at times has a documentary-type flow, which make the scenes of sex and violence that much more disturbing. The absolutely mahvelous looking Bijou Phillips plays the role of an out-of-control teenager caught up in this tale of juvenile delinquency that would have James Dean rolling in his grave.

Friday, January 15, 2010

Babe of the Week For January 15th, 2010 is...


She's young, beautiful, talented and in the most publicly toxic and abusive relationship in the music biz. What more could you possibly want out of a woman? Please check out the spread GQ magazine did of her in their January 2010 issue. Man, does she loook mahvelous, dahling!!! Absolutely mahvelous!!!

Here a a few of those photos-

Nice, huh? Here are a few more shots of her from around the world, just in case you're not convinced-

Monday, January 11, 2010

The Tennessee Volunteers...

You gotta love a coach who shows up to support the women's basketball program at his school looking just as crazy as one of the fans. Bruce Pearl is a maniac, and one hell of a coach. Yesterday's game was a testament to what his team can accomplish on any given night.

Knocking off the undefeated #1 team in the land is one thing. Doing it shorthanded is quite near impossible, but the Volunteers did it. They beat the University of Kansas, who up until yesterday ripped through the first half of the season, kicking all kinds of ass and looking like world beaters. The Tennessee game was supposed to be a cakewalk for them. But it wasn't.

Tennessee suffered the loss of four of their top eight scorers. Senior Tyler Smith was dismissed outright for (what else?) misdemeanor guns and drugs charges. The other three (Cameron Tatum, Melvin Goins and Brian Williams, who were arrested on January 1st. with Smith) have been suspended pending further investigation. That left them with six scholarship players and a couple of walk-ons. But they had the appropriately named Scotty Hopson leading the way with 17 points on 7-12 shooting and some spectacular dunks. Photos of Hopson are not from the Kansas game-

It wasn't just Hopson who stepped up. Let's give props to Booby Maze, who scored 16 points, grabbed 7 rebounds and dished out 8 assists. Renaldo Woolridge scored 14, but it was HOW and WHEN he scored that really made the difference. He hit 4 of 6 from 3-point land, and hit three in a row during a pivotal 14-2 Tennessee run. The fact that he hit those shots from the same exact spot on the court says something about Kansas coach Bill Self having his head completely up his ass. What was he thinking when he kept leaving this guy alone to chuck threes during such a critical phase of the game?

But the shot of the night belongs to my man Skylar McBee. What a name. You gotta love the circumstances of this-deep into the second half with the clock winding down, McBee's got the ball on the left side of the court and the play, for whatever reason just dies. So what does he do? Dribbles right, then awkwardly cuts back to the left side (at this point I thought he'd get called for traveling, that's how bad this move looked) and heaves a three-pointer with all the grace of a drunken retiree stumbling off the deck of a cruise ship into the deep blue sea.

And it was all net, baby. All net. So for all those one-and-done superstars like John Wall of Kentucky and the rest from years past, keep going. You aren't a part of what this is all about. College basketball is not about the guys who stay one year, finish only one semester of classes and then head to the NBA. College basketball is about walk-on Skylar McBee and the Tennessee Volunteers, who despite being undermanned and over-matched showed up to play a game everyone knew they were going to lose and won it. Fuckin' A. Here's to you coach Pearl and the rest of the crew at Tennessee. Thanks for a hell of a game.

Sunday, January 10, 2010

Film Recommendation of the Week...

Release date-November 13, 2009.
Running time-2 hours 38 minutes.

Just another apocalyptic, end-of-the-world Hollywood megamovie? Yes. Is it entertaining? Absolutely. Apart form some of the sappier parts, which thankfully are kept to an absolute minimum, you will not be bored at all even though the film runs for over 2 1/2 hours.

The cast is excellent (when are Danny Glover and John Cusak ever bad?), the storyline never sags and the special effects are amazing. Don't download this movie and watch it on a small computer screen or even a flatscreen at home, regardless of how big it is. This film is made to be seen in a theater. So find one with the biggest screen possible and go have a great time. You will enjoy this film immensely if you are fan of disaster movies-this one is definitely one of the best I've ever seen.

Saturday, January 9, 2010

Babe of the Week For January 8th, 2010 is...

Jessica Alba!!!

Sorry to disappoint you guys, but cutey-pie Jessica is about as Latin in heritage as Larry David from "Curb Your Enthusiasm". That whole rumor is just a pathetic excuse to perpetuate the ignorant stereotype of the "Hot Latina". It's total and complete bullshit, so stop believing it. Having said that, she is one of those women who come around every now and then who are known more for their beauty than for possessing any type of acting talent.

But that's OK. We here at Busting Chops don't care about talent as a prerequisite for "Babe of the Week" consideration. The woman just has to loook mahvelous, dahling-and she most certainly does.

Friday, January 8, 2010

Welcome 2010!!! Pt.2...

Chris Henry

There will be no R.I.P. for this idiot. At 6'4" and 200 pounds of solid muscle and pure speed, he had what few are born with-the freakish athletic ability to play pro football inn the NFL. And just what did he do with his talent?

He got arrested so many times that commissioner Roger Goodell suspended him for the first eight games of the 2007 season for violation of the NFL's personal conduct policy. In other words, it is written in the contract of every NFL player that they cannot go out and act the fool while being employed by the league in any capacity.

And it was stupid shit he kept getting pinched for. The second to last incident involved Henry punching an 18 year-old in the face, throwing a bottle and smashing the guy's car window. All over an unpaid debt. As an NFL player, exactly what the fuck are you doing out in the street lending teenagers money?

But it was the LAST incident which became, well, his last. As befitting a dysfunctional, jive-ass motherfucker blessed with physical talent and absolutely no sense, Henry expired from wounds suffered while dry surfing on the back of a pickup truck driven by the biggest ghetto-ass hoochie this side of...(insert your favorite ghetto HERE).

Here is the interview-

A question for you, darling-
If you love your man so "hard" as they say in the 'hood, why put his life in such jeopardy? You have any idea how difficult it is to find a professional athlete to fall in love with a country-ass ghetto hedgehog such as yourself?

So now the cash register has closed for her. The story goes that they were having an argument and she sped off, knocking him off balance and he went sprawling off the back of the truck. He died from severe head injuries, which is consistent with the accident report. I imagine his head must have hit the pavement more times than a bowling ball hurled into the gutter by Fred Flintstone.

Now just what the fuck he was doing on the back of a pickup truck is beyond me. What she was doing speeding off knowing he was back there standing is again another mystery worthy of the good Sherlock Holmes. However it happened, it cements the theory that too many pro athletes are blessed with physical gifts they are clearly unworthy of possessing. If he left behind any children, they unfortunately will pay the price for his stupidity.

Jim Leavitt-Rat on a Hot Tin Roof

Another asshole coach getting nailed for abusing his players. Does this guy not have ESPN? Does he not understand that the collective tide is turning on the whole football coach-as-tyrant thing? Yes, some of these young men need a bit more, um, "mentoring" than others. What do you expect? Some of these football players would not even be attending college if it wasn't for football. Some are idiots, some have lower IQ's than others, and still others are just straight-up dickheads. "Tough love" is definitely required with some of these head cases.

But the whole college football environment is not really conducive to tolerance and accountability. It's a violent sport with type-A personality-having, frustrated ex-jocks coaching hyper-aggressive young men in their physical primes. There are bound to be problems on every campus with a major D-I football program. So my contention is the only time problems are made public is when things are really and truly out of hand.

Not only did he choke a player and punch him in the face TWICE, he went around trying to convince anyone who could have ratted him out to change their stories. He took a school, the University of South Florida, that never had a football team when his tenure began and did some solid work given the circumstances. But he didn't win ENOUGH to keep his job after the shit he pulled. He knew it, and with his career record of 17-18 in the Big East Conference, the whole world know it. He of course is denying the incident, another sign that the prototypical asshole football coach cannot and will not change his stripes regardless of what's at stake. A little contrition, a few well-placed apologies could of served him well. But we will never know the answer to that. This type of man shows remorse about as often as a middle eastern terrorist changes the towel on his head.

So it's good riddance to the rat-faced coach. He, along with Mark Mangino and Mike Leach will land on their feet at another program. It all depends on how well they sell themselves, and how desperate a sagging program is to sell it's soul to bring athletic success to it's football program.

Saturday, January 2, 2010

Welcome 2010!!! Pt. 1...

Happy New Year, Everyone!!!! Glad to be back after computer problems kept me offline for a few weeks. The issues haven't been resolved totally, but enough has been done for me to keep things moving here.


We have a lot to catch up on, so let me start by giving Converse a big "Fuck You" for their handling of the "Heaven is a Playground" exhibit in Lower Manhattan. When the dates were first posted on, the times were inexplicably not listed. So I went on two separate occasions at two different times of the day and each time I found the place closed. I went back on the website and the days and hours of operation were finally posted, but way after the exhibit began.

So I marched over on Saturday, December 19th at 1 p.m. and again it was closed. There was a snowstorm forecast for that day, but it had just begun coming down when I got there. Nice of them to notify us in advance.

To this day I still have not seen it. There is no phone number to call and no signs posted at the spot. Just a storefront gate that remains slammed shut. You can't even tell if you're in the right place or not when you're walking along this particular block. I will say this-if you want to relive your glory days as a crack dealer in the projects from the late 80's-early 90's and are in the market for a shearling coat, a leather Eight-Ball jacket or a vintage triple fat goose, then Orchard Street is where you want to be.

And I love the hours the exhibit is open from-noon to 4 p.m. Thursdays through Saturdays. Anyone with a job will have to go either between these hours or wait until Saturday, when it will more than likely be closed with no explanation whatsoever.

Now I understand why Converse could not capitalize on the sneaker wars of the early 1980's when they had the two biggest stars in the NBA, Magic Johnson and Larry Bird, signed to endorsement deals.

Nike blew past them and Converse became truly irrelevant soon after signing Michael Jordan, who incidentally wore Converse throughout his 3 years at the University of North Carolina and was even born in Brooklyn no less!!! Converse was the shoe everyone wore on the playgrounds back in the day and have massive, old-school street cred because of it. But they became obsolete for a reason. As a company, if they can't get something like a photo exhibit right, it speaks volumes for their incompetence.

So Fuck You, Converse. How hard is it in this day and age to disseminate accurate information in a timely fashion about an event you're promoting ?

Gilbert Arenas of the Washington "Bullets"

It turns out Agent Zero was using his locker stall at the Verizon Center in Washington, D.C. as a weapons storage facility for the upcoming invasion of the nation's capital by Al-Quaida. This jackass is reported to have stored unloaded guns in his locker not registered in D.C., which have some of the most stringent gun control laws in the country. Seeing as D.C. has had the dubious distinction of being the murder capital of the states, I can see why such laws are on the books.

But gets better. Arenas and his teammate, 22 year-old Javaris Crittenton squared off and pointed guns at each other in the middle of the locker room after a dispute over a gambling debt. Arenas, a nine-year NBA veteran, who should of known better, used this moment to hold a seminar on Crittenton's behalf on anger management and dispute resolution by pulling out like Doc Holliday at the OK Corral.

Which leads me to ask, WTF? Arenas, apparently oblivious to the consequences of his actions, acted as if he knew nothing of the incidents when asked by reporters. It's good that he has the reputation of not sweating the small stuff, because he will need that psychotic, self-absorbed mental make-up to get him through the investigations that will be forthcoming. I don't expect anything to come of this because there is no way in Hell any of his teammates are going to throw him under the bus, but Agent Zero needs to be more discreet about packing heat in the gambling parlor that is the Washington Wizard's locker room.

Mike Leach and Adam James

There must have been something else going on besides a headstrong coach clashing with a pretty-boy receiver with entitlement issues for the powers that be at Texas Tech to fire the one man responsible for breathing life back into their moribund program.

Football in Texas is a religion, and there are shrines all over the state at every one of their Division-I schools. The stadium at Texas Tech has had to undergo expansion every year for the last couple of years due to the increasing popularity of the program. Mike Leach won, and he did so with an exciting blend of speed on both sides of the ball and a passing attack that played to the strengths of his recruits.

Texas Tech does not have the pedigree as other more esteemed blue-chip programs have, but they put themselves on the map and are exciting to watch. This will invariably change now that Leach has been bounced from the school for allegedly abusing one of his players. Leach sent wide receiver Adam James to go sit in a dark shed during a practice session in which James showed up wearing shades that supposedly were recommended by a doctor after he suffered a concussion. When coach Leach asked James about the shades, he responded that they were recommended to him because he was "sensitive to light". So the coach put him in a dark place, and then quickly soon after Leach found himself in a similarly dark place-the unemployment line.

Here is a photo of the shed in question-

One of the things I felt Leach did wrong was throw this player under the bus when he received his suspension. Instead of speaking directly to the incident, Leach had his attorney attack James and spoke of his obnoxious sense of entitlement, laziness at practices and how his father, a football analyst for ESPN, was always pestering the coaching staff over his son's development and playing time.

These things could all have been true, but a televised interview was not the venue to air those issues. To his credit, James' father, when interviewed about the incident and all that was said about him and his son, took the high road and did not stoop to the level of Leach's attorney. Then, to make matters worse, a few days later Leach came out and said the exact same things HIMSELF. He even tried to get a court order to coach his team for their bowl appearance, attempting to override the school's suspension. After all this, he was fired.

Here are the major points-

1) It may have been true that this player James was an asshole to coach. But we also know that football coaches, regardless of how smart and unconventional they may be, can also be assholes. What Leach should of done is cut James, plain and simple.

2) Secondly, Leach also should not have aired the contentious relationship he had with both James and his father, knowing this guy is a nationally known and respected college football analyst who has as big a microphone as he does.

3) Third, Leach should of kept the acrimonious relationship he had with university brass out of the headlines. The public airing of such grievances made it impossible for him to walk back through the door he just slammed on yourself.

It may have been true that the university was not happy with the influence Leach had at their school. They then should not have signed him to a contract extension last year. They apparently did not realize the type of influence resurrecting a bullshit football program in a state like Texas comes with. They cannot have it both ways. A coach like Mike Leach wields power. That is the trade-off for the success and revenue he brings in.

Unfortunately, no one at the university was on the same page and the Red Raiders will never be as fun to watch again. I guess Texas Tech needs to start tearing down all those extra seats they had put in their stadium, because they will be empty for a very long time.