Friday, October 14, 2011

Babe of the Week for October 14, 2011 is...

Lauren Caitlin Upton!!!

Ah, Lauren-you stoopid good-loooking, you!!! You shot to national prominence for displaying stupidity beyond the call of duty in 2007. While running for the Miss Teen USA pageant you were tripped up by a question that no one in their right mind should ask a beauty contestant. Here is the clip just in case any of you out there forgot-

It's alright, because she managed to bounce back from this to become...I don't really know. All I know is her youtube video became an overnight sensation, garnering over 51 million hits. That's people from all over the world, even ones who don't have maps!!! Regardless of what she's doing now, she loooks mahvelous, dahling-absolutely mahvelous!!!

I would personally like to thank the good state of South Carolina, where they make their inbred, white trash look sooooooooo good!!! Here is Lauren right after the Miss Teen Universe debacle, making an epic comeback on the "Today" show-

People reading this need to understand how seriously fine this woman is. She is 5'9" tall barefoot, which means in heels she towers over most of us, and that is a good thing. If you have the opportunity (and the luck, which is required in mass quantities unless you are a celebrity, a big-time jock or have tons of Mexican narco-trafficker money lying around your house) to lasso a woman like this to be your girl, make sure you parade her around for all to see, because no one will believe you otherwise.


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